My Cheesy Fall Weekend Post
So, here I am, at work again. In two hours I will be kissing this campus good-bye and going home for the weekend, which I’m actually really excited about. I’ve got plans to hang out with old friends I haven’t seen in months and I’m definitely pumped. Tonight is homecoming for my old high school and after the game is a bonfire. While I have absolutely zero interest in pumpkin-spice lattes, I do love this time of year for the bonfires. Something about that smell, the chilly breeze and the fights over lawn chairs close to the fire makes me feel at home. Plus every time a big group of us nerdy people get together, there is always chaos. The chaos makes me feel at home, too, and gives me a sort of peace inside that knows these crazy people are there for me if I need them. When I think of home, I feel as if the entire town is in a snow globe, standing still in time and never changing. I dread the day when I finally come home and something is different, when reality crashes down and I see that my home has changed without me.
But, hey, just another perk of getting older, right? That’s why I’m not too interested in going to the football game. Yeah, it’s homecoming, but I go to college now, I have a new school to cheer for. Besides, I’ve really missed my boyfriend this week and want to hang out with him one-on-one before going to the bonfire together. Part of me knows that if I wasn’t hanging out with him tonight I’d go, but the other part knows that when I see my younger friends who are still in high school it’ll be different. I feel like high school was a million years ago, because I’m so immersed in this new independent lifestyle. And the school work, the teachers, are nothing compared to how they are in college. The people, too. The attitudes surrounding you are more mature, more I-don’t-give-a-fuck. Little do these high schoolers know that once they get to college their whole lives will change.
Not that I’m super wise now or whatever, and that being a college student makes you all so mighty. I’m still a fuck-up, I’m just a fuck-up with a diploma.
And it’s nice to just go back in time a little. To see my parents and my dogs and be someone’s kid again. My mom wants to make Halloween cards together, and I just know she all of her decorations up around the house. It’ll be nice to just sit at home and not think about any upcoming exams, just focus on what I want to do and not what I need to do.
Of course there’s always next weekend, where I could be hanging out at the frat houses and getting drunk off my ass, where Caitlin and I watch The Notebook and cry and eat a lot of unhealthy things. But that’s not now, and I’m not going to think about how lonely or busy or boring it could be. Right now I’m a lady on a mission to do laundry, to laugh until my voice goes hoarse, and to see my boyfriend in front of my eyes, and fall in love with him all over again.
Maybe that’s super cheesy, but it’s better that writing about how terrible my French quiz went.